If you have ever dealt with customers, you will love this site...
http://notalwaysright.com/category/top(I get a call for troubleshooting from a lady who says her remote doesn’t work.)
Me: “Ok ma’am, could you try changing the channel for me? Tell me if a light flashes on the remote.”
Lady: “Ok.”
(There are a few loud beeps from her phone in my ear and she comes back on the line.)
Lady: “Nope, no flashing.”
Me: “Ma’am you’re trying to change the channel with your phone, not the remote control.”
Lady: “I can’t find the clicker, and I know my neighbor changes channels with her phone.”
Me: “Ma’am, that’s just not possible.”
Lady: “Don’t accuse me of lying! I saw her do it with my own eyes.”
Me: “…”
(I try for 10 minutes to explain to her why she can’t use her phone, and even make a futile attempt to troubleshoot her phone.)
Me: “Ok, well it looks like your satellite receiver isn’t compatible with your phone.”
Lady: “Yes it is. My neighbor and I have the same phone and same receiver. NOW HELP ME, DUMBA**!”
Me: “Ma’am, do you have a cordless phone?”
Lady: “Yes!”
Me: “Ok ma’am, let’s try reprogramming your phone. What I need you to do is press and hold the ‘off’ button for five seconds. This will clear the old code, so we can put the new one in.”
Lady: “Ok—” *click*
(I hear my supervisor a few rows away from me bust out laughing.)
____________
(I was walking a customer through setting up a fairly complex product.)
Customer: “Next or back?”
Me: “Next.”
Customer: “Okay, now next or back?”
Me: “We do not need to change any of the default settings, so we will be hitting next on the next 7 or 8 screens in a row. Let me know when another option other then next or back appears.”
Customer: *obviously not getting it* “Okay, now do I hit next or back?”
Me: “Hit next, and also hit next on the following 5 or 6 pages until there is no more next button.”
Customer: “Okay, I clicked next. Now do I hit next or back?”
(At this point I am going insane and decide to have a little fun.)
Me: “Click back.”
Customer: “Okay, now next or back?”
Me: “Click next.”
Customer: “Okay, next or back?”
Me: “Click back.”
Customer: “Okay, next or back?”
Me: “Click next.”
Customer: “Okay, next or back?”
Me: “Click back.”
(This goes on for a few minutes until the customer realises what’s going on. Or so I thought…)
Customer: “I think it’s broken, it keeps looping through the same pages!”
I missed out on the original website too, thanks Khem
lol wtf?!
poor guy ... 
*sings* his as cold as ice 
